There is something about routines that make them totally unpleasant. It’s the consistency of it all. The way they make your life turn like it’s on a carousel that you can’t get off or the way it makes you feel that your life is confined to a single canvass and you’re stuck painting within the edges. It somehow makes life safe and predictable and ultimately, DULL.
At first things are exciting and brand new then after a while (a few years) they slowly become routine, like now. My daily routine is basic for every student. I wake up, take a bath, study, go to school on schooldays or stay at home on day-offs and holidays, come back home, watch a movie or TV episodes, study, listen to music, then sleep (while eating in between) and the next day comes. Every day. Maybe I need a push or a sudden jolt. Travel maybe? Nope. No budget. Work part-time? Nope. No time. Join an organization or club? Still no time. Ugh. I know I’m stuck in a loop right now that’s why my current strength and energy is constantly being drained. I need a refresher. I want to exercise and get that boost of energy everyone’s talking about whenever they finish their morning/afternoon exercise routines (there it is, routine again) but I don’t have the spare money to buy the necessary equipment i.e. jog shorts and running shoes (these actually cost a fortune, if you want good quality shoes that doesn’t give you blisters and athlete’s foot). I am, at the moment, literally trying to break this semi-endless circle of routine in my current lifestyle. But what can possibly break this routine? Most of the things that I am thinking about doing need a sort of spare amount of money and since I’m currently living on minimum wage (allowance for a student) I cannot afford to take on petty things (for now) like exercise (not the usual morning exercises), music/self-defense lessons, start a small business, etc.
Now I’m suddenly remembering Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. When people’s basic needs remain unfulfilled (which for now is where I am, the first stage) they can never attain self-fulfillment because they’d have to struggle everyday to fulfill their basic needs first. So pursuit for something greater like higher education, better lifestyle and others become less important to people such as myself. Maybe that’s why I don’t feel like my current life in law school now is of any importance. I’d rather find a suitable career except for the fact that my parents would not allow it at the moment. They made me promise to finish the course before I even attempt to do anything crazy with my life. Parents, what can I say?
Maybe that’s also why people struggle to be rich or accumulate wealth because they think that when one has enough wealth to provide for their basic necessities then they’d be able to advance to the next level of Maslow’s hierarchy and eventually reach the self-fulfillment stage – the state of Enlightenment for Buddhists. Nirvana as what the Hindus would call it. Heaven for most of us Christians, well almost. So technically there’s nothing wrong with the pursuit of wealth or stability in finances. People would more likely want their lives in constant routine as long as it’s stable and their basic needs are met. At least, that’s what most people think. But humans are never content. I think it’s in our genetic imprints that we constantly look for something new and get fascinated by new discoveries. We have been explorers and inventors since the dawn of our time here on Earth. I think it’s in our blood and embedded in our subconscious. So when we become stable in one thing, we look for another bigger thing. We desire to go up the hierarchy until we become fully satisfied. What was once new, thrilling and exciting suddenly becomes routine and we crave for more.
I will never believe anyone who says that they are truly content with what they currently have. Maybe they’re content in a way that they are grateful to have come so far from where they once were but a person can never truly be content. We are a species that continues to evolve depending on the circumstances we are in. Evolution – it’s our genetic calling. So a human being can never be content. We always want more. Now, this is not being greedy or anything. It is just that we know for a fact that we have the potential to exceed our limits and we try everyday to do that. Not in a greedy manner but in an evolving manner. We want to improve and become better as persons and as humans as well. That’s basically why we reproduce. We pass on good genes and knowledge that we have accumulated throughout the generations for the improvement of the human race. Routines are some things that we might never accept for a very long time. We always want to change. Like a saying goes – Nothing is constant but change.
Routines, I never really liked them and that makes me more human than ever. I am therefore proud to say that I am, right now, bored and not content with my life. Yes, I am eternally thankful for all the blessings and favors that I have received and are constantly receiving still but somehow I want more than this routine life that I have right now. I want to break free. Someday, somehow, somewhere, I might find that thing that will allow me to break away from this routine. I’ll be patiently waiting for that time and that opportunity and when that time comes I will definitely grab hold of it and never let go. When I get there then I’d have to savor it all and wait until it turns into a routine again. Then I’d do it all over again and the process just goes on and on as I constantly improve and become a better person than I am right now. Evolution, here I come!
P.S. I probably watched too much Doctor Who episodes that I’m starting to sound both scientific and philosophical at the same time. That’s it, enough for now. Good night everyone. 🙂
The Lazy Geeky Joou-sama 