How can I tell if this is becoming real?
How can I say that this is exactly how I feel?
When can you tell me the right time to start or stop?
When will I know the exact moment to go on or give up?
I look into your eyes and I cannot tell
In terms of hiding your feelings, you really do it well
You are a weird one because with you I am not so sure
Is it because of your blank gaze or your mysterious allure?
I find myself both longing and running away from you
Which is kind of confusing and unprecedented too
When I see you I don’t know what I’m supposed to think
And when you are near I feel like I’m standing on a brink
Can I just ask you or would that be too forward of me?
Will you tell me then yourself or should I just wait and see?
For now I’ll just wonder what these feelings really are
As I look at you standing there, here from afar
Hoping this wonder will someday finally be gone
and then I’ll know precisely whether or not you’re the one.
We know one another by name alone
What do I really know about you?
Do you even know who I am too?
We call each other by nicknames and yet
Most about each other we don’t even have the right to forget
because we don’t know that much.
We are a team, a good one even
But aside from that what else is there?
Do you think we ought to know, isn’t that only fair?
We laugh, talk and move as if we’ve known the other for so long
but it isn’t anywhere like that, what seems so is really wrong
because we’re just strangers.
So how can I feel this for someone such as you?
Maybe this really isn’t real, and it’s pretentious too
Maybe I’d just go with things as they appear for now
Hoping that one day and one time, it’ll work out somehow.
“DEAR CERTAIN SOMEONE”
Dear certain someone
wherever you are
Are you near where I am now
or are you still dilly-dallying from afar?
Hey certain someone
whose name I might still don’t know
Are you readying yourself to meet me
or are you running scared too?
Yo, certain someone
don’t you think the time is nigh?
For that one special moment
that we finally get to say, “Hi!”
I am waiting, patiently waiting for that time
When your path finally turns to a new direction
and crosses into mine.
*Thank you to Kat Cabanos for lending me her precious fountain pen with Midnight Black and Oxblood inks which inspired me to write these poems in one go. Someday I’ll own one too after I get my first paycheck SOON. Haha. 🙂